Escape from Sarajevo-part 19: Love

SIX
The policeman below Ana’s building stepped from the shadows and tapped his watch with a finger. I had hitched a ride back with a couple of young soldiers returning from the front. I all but ignored the cop. There was a candle burning in Ana’s window. It was the only light in the whole neighborhood. I felt as though I had failed her and wasn’t sure I could even face her. I called up. Ana was at the window immediately.
“What happened?” she asked.
“I got arrested.”
She looked up and down the empty street. “Come upstairs quickly.”
Renata insisted that we sleep in her bed. She said we would have some privacy there. She would sleep in the war room with Olja and the baby. We protested, but she said something about the cushions there being better for her back. Ana and I didn’t buy the excuse, but it was much too late to argue. Olja was already fast asleep, sprawled across the cushions. Renata didn’t attempt to wake her, and threw a blanket across her shoulders instead.
The bedroom was freezing cold. Much colder than the rest of the house because of a crack in the window. Our breaths rose in the darkness. We undressed quickly and slipped beneath the thick blankets. She moved readily to my side, as if it had been her place forever. Her cool cheek was pressed to my chest. I stroked the smooth flesh of her back and moved closer to her warmth.
“Isn’t it funny?” I kissed her hair. “As eager as I was to get out of this hell hole I really felt cheated we couldn’t spend our first night together as man and wife. My only regret is not getting out. I feel like I’ve failed you, Ana, and I would rather die. I’ll get out of here. If there is one crack, one little gap or unguarded hole…Ana?”
She was already sound asleep. Gently I ran my fingers across her bare shoulders and down along the gentle curve of her hips. Now and then my touch disturbed the even rhythm of breathing. She would stir and sigh at the pleasure of my touch. Her legs tangled in mine and tears came to my eyes. I would have to try and escape again in the morning, but for now I was content in our warm cocoon of love.